I am Black Sheep.
As you learn about me you will understand why I am so called. Don’t make assumptions as they will generally be incorrect. Keep an open mind and it will become clear in time, I promise. This blog is designed to share a personal journey that has recently proven to be the most amazing roller-coaster of my entire life. You see, I am adopted, very successfully so. All adopted people at some point in their lives feel a burning need to put missing pieces of their personal jigsaw puzzle together. This is perfectly natural and any adoptive parent who is surprised this emotional need arises is considerably naive or didn’t look into the adoption process thoroughly enough.
Adopted in the late 1960’s as a black baby girl into a white middle class family. I love my family with all my heart and they me, and its always been my plan to trace my heritage, (‘roots’, if you like…although I see roots as the facets of my life that make me who I am, the people around me who make me feel safe, rather than as genetics).
My blog is a resource for people who want to trace their birth parents, in particular birth mothers. I felt I should set this up following a near useless attempt by a my local authority. The issues raised in my blog will probably amaze and disturb you as I will outline just how and why most agencies and local authority services fail to look at the bigger picture. They seem unsure as to whether they are a counseling service or a tracing service or both. Rather than slate their inadequacies, driven by restrictive red tape, I aim to offer alternative methods which you can take on board or not. You need to be fairly brave and one hundred per cent certain you can cope with the outcome whatever it may be. I wont tell you its easy, will be totally honest and warn you from the start, its damned scary. However, if you need a job doing, do it yourself…but have your wits about you at all times.
My method is NOT governed by beaurocracy and rule and regulations, I think any Adoption tracing agency would fire me if I even suggested my methodology in the workplace. All I do know for a fact is that I did what felt right, and with every step I pushed my own boundaries emotionally and it worked. I found my Birth Mother and there is no reason to stop until you do. Your birth relative is one of two things: Dead or Alive. Both situations allow that person to be found so its worth a shot isn’t it? There is of course NO guarantee your birth relative is wishing to be traced but they might. You need to decide if you can cope if they feel it is not the right time for them, but I can only assume you have prepared yourself for this. I am not offering a counseling service, just simple steps to help you on your journey.
Red tape and Data protection aside, the journey you will travel is long, often tedious and may or may not have a happy ending. Mine did but I was fully aware, with my eyes wide open, to the fact that I was potentially lifting the lid off a huge can of worms that once opened would no way be squished back in again.
My blog is to offer Support, methodology outside of your usual way of thinking and hopefully a few laughs along the way. Sensible comments and input is welcomed, dumb or rude comments will be deleted and reported to Google for spam…I am fierce so don’t upset me!!:-) Sort of a fluffy Wolf in Black Sheep clothing?
Coming Soon: You are welcome to download my Adoption Journey for a small fee once I make this available. Names are changed to protect the privacy of those family members involved
So, if like me, you are at a stage in your life when you ‘qualify’ (see my recommended qualifications for being in the right place emotionally to embark on this journey) to take this roller-coaster ride, then follow me as I walk you through step by step to find your Birth Parent.
Fasten your seat belts and we will begin…………………